I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

your momma so stupid she dropped out of high school

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

your mom's stupid face is a dumb butthead. I hate you.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Her frustrated farmer lured her with bread crums in hopes of retrieving his beloved chicken.

Your mom is so fat, that i don't think she's attractive anymore.

what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

Why was the boy seeing stars? It was night time.

What do you get when you cross a Mexican and an African? A baby.

whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

hey babe, are you made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium? because i like people made of copper, tellerium, tungsten and iridium.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

Psychics.

why did the chicken cross the road? it accidentally got out of it's pen. the farmer got very mad at the chicken for getting out, and very vicous-like, yelled at the chicken, causing it to get scared, and run to the other side. and that, is why the chicken crossed the road.

A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

A lion and a cheetah raced each other and the cheetah won Lion: "man you're a cheetah!" Cheetah: "no you're lion!" Then the cheetah tears off the lions head and feeds it to their babies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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