Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have your test results, You have cancer.

What is the last thing to go through a flies head before it hits a windshield. Nothing because flies aren't capable if rational thought.

What was the little boys least favorite part of Christmas? Getting raped by his uncle.

What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

Q: Why didn't Dwight D. Eisenhower play with the silly putty? A: Because he's dead.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

women's rights

What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

Hey I just met you I'm on bathsalts your face looks tasty

An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

A black guy and a Puerto Rican are in a car. Who's driving? Most likely one of the two, because if they were not that would be illegal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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