What do you call a 3 legged dog on a red unicycle? An unlikely set of circumstances.

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What do you get a kid with no arms for Christmas? Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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What did Little Tommy get for chirstmas? An explanation that Santa is a lie.

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I man walks into a bar. He drinks four beers, gives the bartender his keys, and takes a cab home. The next day he gets his best friend to drop him off at the bar, picks up his car, and is three minutes early to work.

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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why did the black guy cross the street? to get to the package store.

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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What did the woman say when her boyfriend asked her to marry him? Idk my bff jill.

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~Roses Are Red~ ~Violets Are Blue~ ~I Am Straight~ ~Not Sure About You~ ~Tell us?~

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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why was the black man running away from the convenient store? He was going for a jog and it just so happened that he passed by the store

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Women's Rights

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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whats the best joke ever? womens rights

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I like my women how I like my ice-cream Out cold.

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I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

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Knock Knock The guy opens the door

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What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops