What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

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At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

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What happened to the boat that sank? Everyone on it died

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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Yo mama so fat that you should maintain strong eye contact with her and not look at her body.

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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I touch my sons dick XoXo Wendy.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house... Knock, knock Who's there? The chicken.

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Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

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What did the black man eat at a picnic? I don't know, I wasn't there.

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i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

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Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

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A man gets a new job working for his boss. Later, he beats his boss in a fight, quits his job, and starts his own business. Historians later concluded that the man's life would serve as a perfect national allegory for the USA.

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What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

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A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

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What is worst than Justin Bieber new album? Being a jew during the holocaust or aids.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a black man. A pizza can feed a family of five.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

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Why was the boy sad? because the serotonin level in his brain was significantly lower than normal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops