What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

How do you stop a bus? Wait at the bus stop and it will stop for you.

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks him "why the long face?" the man replies with "I have AIDS."

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I'm a dog

Why are video games fun? To get a mushy brain :P

What did the man say to the other man? Nothing, they didn't know each other..

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 killed 6's family

why did the chicken cross the road? cause it can bitch.

do you want my comeback? its in your mums mouth

How did the man rob the bank? With a gun

What do a Shark and a lemon have in common? They can both swim, except for the lemon

What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

The Bible

How do you amuse a blonde? ? tell her to go to antijokes.com ( :

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

What's worse then listening to Nickleback? The Holo- On second thought, nothing.

An Unicorn walks into a club, the bartender promised to quit drugs and thanks to that his family didn't fall apart and he lived happily till he was 89 when he passed away surrounded by loved ones.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

A man walks into a bar. He breaks his neck and his insurance provider hikes up his interest rate.

am man walks into a bar, and suffers from brain damage

yo momma is so stupid she went to the beach and the whales song " dooooooonnn't stop. belieeeeving. wwwwwhoooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOA"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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