How can you tell if someone is a virgin? Everyone is a virgin in something. For example, if you never had sex with a dinosaur, then you are a virgin at dinosaur sex.

Man 1- What's red, black, and white all over? Man 2- What? Man 1- Half a penguin! Man 2 became seriously disturbed from this joke, as he saw the movie Happy Feet two days ago. He went to intense therapy and became mentally deranged.

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

What is worse than being eaten alive by a shark? Being force fed live goat intestines while Kevin Spacey rapes your father.

why did the car go to the bathroom? it had gas.

what did the nostalgic robot barber say to all of his customers before cutting their hair? 0010101000011100101000100100100110101010100101010101010

How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

Yo mama so stupid, she should be worried about Alzheimer's disease.

took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

I need a sidecart on my motorcycle just for my diick

So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home.

You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

Why did Brooke go to the bathroom? She had to pee

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You know most poems rhyme, This one doesn't

Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

How do you solve a scatter plot? Give a pencil to Michael J. Fox.

Why did the boy fall? He got tackled by a man that was 400 pounds.

What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

Why did the vulture cross the road? To get to the pile of dead babies left over from the Holocaust.

What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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