how do you stop a baby from crawling in circles??????? you nail its other hand to the floor

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's dead.

The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

http://adf.ly/C8MqG

What do you call a blonde with half a brain? A victim of an alcohol related car accident

your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

What did little John get for his birthday? No sort of disease or illness of any kind because he was in perfect health. He also got an Xbox.

Why did the little boy fall down the tree? He didn't. He jumped.

Why did the Flintstones have Christmas? The Flintstones celebrated Christmas because the creator, William Hanna, celebrated it. As it is a kids TV show, you can't expect it to be factually correct.

Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

Did you hear the joke about the pencil? Nevermind it was pointless.

Whats Brown, Long and is on every black man? Legs

What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

Q: humpty dumpty sat on a wall A: yeah right

Why was 13 afraid of 27 Because 51 had an extra penis

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

How do you get out of a car with only a baseball bat and a hammer? Unlock the door.

whats big and green, andif it falls from a tree , it can kill you? a golfcourse

What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

Q. Whats brown and sticky? A. Poo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...