What's the difference between Tom and Jerry? One is a cat, and the other is a mouse.

What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

You wanna hear a clean joke? Mary takes a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is a man.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

knock knock Dave's not here.

What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

Why did the clown fall out of the tree? He got shot.

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

Yo' momma is so old she should probably go to the doctor and check her health so she can live a longer, more healthy life.

What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

What is a black person's favorite food? It varies from person to person, just as with any race.

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

How do you stop a plane? Land it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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