How can you tell that the Filipino presidential candidate Grace Poe is an alien? From her extra set of retractable jaws and highly acidic body fluids.

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How do you make your children nice? You dont have any.

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A rapist walks into a bar. He is promptly arrested afterwards.

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a Fridge.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? An opera singer singing in the shower

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Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

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what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

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why did sarah have to do overtime at work? because i set her house on fire

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimers Cheese on toes

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Q: How do you make an mail man cry? A: Take his car and run over his family.

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roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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How do you create an antijoke? Story written by Danny and Patrick

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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HEYEEYAHEYAYYAEEAHHAAA

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What is veiny, turns hard, and has a tip at the end? The male genitalia used as a reproductive organ mainly in sexual intercourse known as a Penis.

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Your mother is so fat, she really could stand to lose a few pounds.

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A horse finds himself sleeping in the ocean. Immediately, he decides to be a dolphin.

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What's red and green and goes round and round? A kilt at a scottish dance

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Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

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An anti-joke

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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What did Harold homeless man get for his Birthday? after several years of a meth abuse Harold lost contact with his family. As a result Harold received nothing but an extra bowl of soup at his local soup kitchen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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