A Vietnam war veteran accidentally goes to a Vietnamese concert and says, "I could take a lot of them down with me."

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

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What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

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Knock, knock. Whose there? A Mountain Lion wait...what

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Knock knock. Who's there? Three months to live. Three months to live who? The C-Scan showed a massive, inoperable tumor in your brain that's been developing for years. You have only three months to live.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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HEY.... HEY YOU..... YEA YOU! IM TALKING TO YOU!!! yolo

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

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I suck at online but have a high gamerscore

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Knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me me Oh

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What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

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How do you kill a blonde girl? You put a scratch and sniff sticker on the bottom of a filled pool.

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

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50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

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The Minnesota Vikings won a game.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A comment saying "I don't think that's an anti-joke"

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a man was shot.... he died

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

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Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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