Why did the little boy cry? Because he was badly burnt in a house fire.

What's the difference between video games and a naked chick? The Holocaust.

if you consider his name parents name social security number hospital born date born and nurses signature all on a peice of paper then i guess you consider that his birth certificate

A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

Manchester City

Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem is wrong As violets are violet

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is deceased, therefore rendering her incapable of movement, which is required to drive a vehicle.

Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

What would u like to drink?

You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

Why did the blonde walk into the bar? To get a beer.

Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

call me if you want xxx on 0407777235

What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

Ring around the rosy. A pocket full of posies. Ashes. Ashes. I just set a dead baby on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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