How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I chucked a shit and flushed the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

a man walks into a bar. He left after he drank two beers. Someone pulled his pants down and he didnt notice. when he got home he realized his pants were gone. He returned to the bar to search, but it was a metal bar, and he was fairly stupid. please dont laugh

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whats the fastest way to be murdered tell your wife your cheating on her

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the grandma stop baking cookies? Because she is an aging widow suffering from depression because her family seems to forget her existance as she barely lives day by day wilting in her 1 bedroom home.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

The Dane, the Norwegian and the Chinese where on a plane, and as the plane was malfunctioning, the pilot would shout: "We are overloaded! Toss out everything you can spare!" The Dane tossed out a box of Danish Salami, explaining they had enough of those in his country. The Norwegian tossed out a package of sweaters, explaining that they had enough of those in his country. Suddenly the Chinese jumped out without a given explanation, as time passed though, the surviving crew arrived to some conclusions... Moral: R.I.P Kim the 294834839483948th

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse replies, "my wife has cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -15

how do you make a blond girl cry? kill her family

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many Italians does it take to change a light bulb....... 1

thumb_up thumb_down -15

An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the black man say to the jew at a party Well hello i don't believe we met.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Your mama's so fat, that she died of diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down -15

asking someone to check ur broken wing mirror to fall into that persons arms by accident is not a good idea

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is not a sentient animal and is unaware of the dangers it will face.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Když si to Nikolas ,dejme tomu že Bihary, you know nuseng.. hahahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A white man is found dead in an alley way, who was the murderer? The black guy trying to climb up the walls to escape.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops