What's worse than dropping you're ice cream? Getting your face mauled off by a German Shepard.

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

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Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

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How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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What's the new green? Green

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A Muslim walks into a bar, and has a pint of lager because he has chosen to integrate into his host country's culture. He then leaves without incident.

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A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

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Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

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What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

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What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

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What is the biggest killer in America? Death.

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Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

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Two latino men are drinking at a bar. Suddenly, one man falls off his barstool, unconscious. Later that day, he was diagnosed with pancreatitis, and died never having dealt with his severe alcoholism.

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

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What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

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- Knock, knock. - Who's there? - Immigration.

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Q: Why did the irishman walk into the bar A: Because he wanted a drink

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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