Why did the guy run out of the whorehouse? Because when she spread her legs it looked like she was pulling apart a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

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What is the cost of an abortion? 1 life

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

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What's worse than dying of boredom? ...Being stabbed.

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket.

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is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

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How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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An anti joke a day... really doesn't actually do that much

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Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

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Anyone can post anything.

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

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What happens when you put four drunk clowns and eight sober clowns inside of a clown car? Nothing, because the clowns realized that it's dangerous to operate a vehicle while under the influence of alcohol and decides to call a taxi instead.

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what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

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Why do Vampires drink your blood? Because the movie maker needed a story

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why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops