Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

An over weight naked black guy walks into a bank and says "give me all your money!"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what is brown and sticky? a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

oh, you have a baby on board? I'll just drive into the the car next to you...

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happens if a black person meets a white person? They shake hands

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chcicken cross the road? To get to the other side nl

thumb_up thumb_down -17

I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the boy say before he died? I'm dying.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: what did the black man say after the white man said knock knock A: who's there

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats the difference between a green apple and a red apple? Their colors.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q. What's yellow and sour? A. Not a banana

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? Because she didn’t have any arms. like your mom

thumb_up thumb_down -17

The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Fuzzy-wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy-wuzzy had no hair, Fuzzy-wuzzy died of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the potatoe hot Cuz I cooked it

thumb_up thumb_down -17

roses are red ur face is too and if u r hot my penis is going in u

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops