What did the German girl say to me? entschuldigen Sie (excuse me)

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What's worse then finding a worm in ur apple? Nothing it sucks and it's a waste of an apple

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What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy became cold easily.

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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God is the English name given to a singular being in theistic and deistic religions who is either the sole deity in monotheism, or a single deity in polytheism. He (I use the term 'He' as it is the most common conception) is said to be omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, and omnibenevolent. I highly doubt he will give you lemons.

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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3 guys were caught trespassing in a field and were sent to jail. The cop asked the first guy, "What were you doing in the field? He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop asked the second guy, "What were you doing in the field?" He replied, "I was blowing bubbles" The cop then asked the third guy, "Lemme guess, you were blowing bubbles too? The guy replied, "No silly, I am Bubbles!"

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A russian, a jew, and a black guy are walking down the street. The midget trips and knocks into the jew who in turn knocks into the black guy. It turns out that they all know each other from high school. They ended up going out for lunch and drinks and it actually turned into a great day.

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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how do you make a cripple depressed? stairs..

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Q. what has 2 tums and a boner. A. a horny guy <3

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What's red and has wheels? A red car

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

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What do you call a black man who likes watermelon and fried chicken? Someone who likes good food.

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Science fact: what would happen if you lined up all the veins in your body? You would die.

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What's your blood type? Red.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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why was the pen mad at the pencil? it wasnt. objects don't have feelings

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OMG my mom just let me go to a concert in feb 31,2012 wohoo! LOL

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tea with milk?

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what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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