What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

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what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

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Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Why was the black man drowning? His boat sank.

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I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

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I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

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Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

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Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

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Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

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Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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