Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What do you call a black man being raped by 6 members of the Ku Klux Klan? Rape

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

what has 4 legs three eyes and a horn? a:yo mama

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

thumb_up thumb_down +30

You know your in Houston when... The highway sign says so.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

men, men like men= men+bed

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops