Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

Yo mama is so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing? Her reply was: Kicking a can down the street. What did you think she was doing? Moving?

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not reply as it is a horse and horses cannot speak. The bartender realises his stupid mistake and calls the farm the horse came from. The horse is taken back to the farm and fed some hay. The bartender carries on living his life and then dies of natural causes at a very old age.

So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

What do you get when you mix monster, coke, and and seltzer? Kicked out of stop and shop.

wanna hear a joke? womans rights

Why did the boy get hit by a wrecking ball? Because he picked up an upside down penny.

Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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