What's better than Sookie? The holocaust

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Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

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A Rabbi walks into a bar. He does not order any alcoholic beverages, because Orthodox Jews aren't allowed to consume alcohol except for certain times and religious customs.

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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If you are reading this you are a nerd

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You you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you you. Way do go lazy you didn't read all the you's so you didn't realize there was a yoo in there. But now you realize there aren't any yoo's there way to go.

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Q: Why did the girl fell from the swing? A: Because she had no arms.

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Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

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What's the difference between celery and a truck?

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

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what did the toe say to the other toe? nothing they cant speak

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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roses are red violets are blue im not good at poems so fuck you too.

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Ask me if my names Troy. Is your name troy? No, it's Roy.

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How to stop a baby from crying? Hit it with a brick

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Do you believe in love at first site? Or should I walk by again?

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Why was the boy cold? Because he couldn't afford clothing.

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Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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