So - this baby seal walked into a club.

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I made a friend today. His name is don. He poops burritos. I like burritos.

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What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

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A dog walks in to a Western Union, walks up to the cashier and says "I'd like to buy a telegram, please." The cashier says "Alright, what would you like it to say?" "I'd like it to say 'bow-wow-wow, bow-wow-wow" replies the dog. "Okay. You know, you can add another 'bow-wow-wow' to the message free of charge," the cashier informs. The dog says, "Well, that just wouldn't make any sense."

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Women's Rights

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What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate poems Penis.

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what's worse than a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust. Whats worse than the Haulocaust? Two worms in your apple.

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What do you get if you cross a mexican with a pineapple? Nothing, they are two different physical forms thus incapable of becoming a new object.

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Weird, orange is my favorite color.

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What did God say to the Priest? Nothing, there is no God

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My cousins so stupid she makes straight A's

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Q: What is the difference between a moose and a cow? A: How they're spelled.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a picnic table? The average picnic table can support a family of four, while a Mexican person, depending on his or her career, can support families that include over four people.

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Q. What do you call the person that graduated at the bottom of his medical department? A. Doctor

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black

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P0P T4Rt

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What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

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What did the man do after a bad day at work? He went home and beat his wife

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Three men walk into a bar. A fourth man ducks.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Police. Your mom is dead.

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Knock, knock Who's there? You're adopted...

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What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops