what did i do after u pinched me? i killed everyone

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A man was going to take his girlfriend to prom, and decided to pick up his suit from the dry cleaners. Unfortunately, there was a long line. He then went to pick up some flowers for his date, but there was a long flower line. Finally, he takes his date to prom and decides to get some punch for them.He returns with the refreshing beverage and the couple has a wonderful time.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's house? Well, It's an old style ranch home in a respectable neighborhood.

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How much wood could a Woodchuck chuck if a Woodchuck could chuck wood? The etymology of the name woodchuck is unrelated to wood or chucking

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What falls down, but never gets back up? A dead person.

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Q: Why was the man eating his foot? A: Because he was a part of the circus.

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what did the fish say when i threw it at the wall. Ouch. Then the world ended because it caused a ripple in the fabric of reality.

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Why was the butcher bald? He was undergoing intensive chemotherapy.

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What did the boy with arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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Q; what did the gangster say after he and his gang robbed a bank? A;Hey boys lets go drink some soy milk (After that his gang killed him) but the moral of the story is to not rob banks or take drugs

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whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

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What is little,red and its in the corner??? -strawberry in the corner

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A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

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irish man drinking john smiths

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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Ducks smell too dog like animal farms riverside Chinese tofu hat hairy and eat beanie.

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Q; What feels like plastic and tastes fake? A: School Food

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Your father must be an alien because he's driving a UFO

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Who loves George Clooney? George Clooney

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What did the kid tell his father? Go away, I'm watching elmo!

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How do you poop without it splashing? clench clench, release, clench clench, release, clench, release, clench, release.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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