Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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School is like a boner. It is long and hard unless your asian.

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How come Helen Keller couldn't drive? Because cars were not invented back then.

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What's the difference between a ferrari and a penis? I don't have a stash of ferraris in my garage.

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Why was the boy sad? Because He had a frog stapled to his face

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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why did the students in 7/8 red try to commit suicide? they had miss harding as a teacher!

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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Yo Momma so old, that she has arthritis.

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The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

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What did the unicorn eat for a snack? Nothing. Unicorns are a majestic fiction animal.

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what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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What do you call a smart phone that doesn't want to work? The first conscious phone ever

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what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

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What do you get when you cross an ugly hobo and a diabetic? Don't talk about your mom like that.

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What has 4 legs and doesn't move? A child born in Chernobyl.

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A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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