Why aren't anti jokes funny? Idk. Watermelon in your pants, you're adopted.

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? He'd lost so much weight, due to AIDS.

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Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

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what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

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What's red and smells like cherries. Cherries

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Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

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Why did the two children go sledding? Because they liked to sled.

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There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

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Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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Why couldn't the boy watch the R-rated movie? Cuz he was blind.

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Whats the difference between anti-jokes and regular jokes? A Fridge full of dead babies being thrown at a black man with no arms or legs swinging from a tree.

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Knock Knock there's a doorbell

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knock knock! who's there? me.(walks away...)

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Stephen Hawking

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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