Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Well you should really try some.

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What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

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One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

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You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? What are you doing here?

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage in my hand.

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Why was the man sad? His wife left

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Michael J Fox may not be able to draw a perfect circle but he sure can jerk off like a champ

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Knock knock Who's There? Woo? Woo who? Stop celebrating and let me in.

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What did Petunia say to the other Petunia Hi there Petunia

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

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You're American when you enter the the bathroom and you're American when you exit the bathroom. What are you while you're inside the bathroom? Using the bathroom.

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 6 feet under the ground? Doug What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 3 feet under the ground? Douglas

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops