Actual jokes are now obsolete.

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whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

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Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

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Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: toothpaste

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

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telll someone to ask u if u are a tree then say nooooooo

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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The chickens have become self-aware!

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You: Ask me if I like lasagna. Them: Do you like lasagna? You: No.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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How to trick hundreds or religious people to drink cyanide? You establish a religious community in which you establish a ritual of drinking Kool-Aid once a day and one day switch the Kool-Aid with cyanide.

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What is green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? An elephant I lied!

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Why did you step on my watermelon?

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You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

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anti-joke.com

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My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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