What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

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Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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What did the black boy get for Christmas? A bike his parents bought him.

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Why was the black man drowning? His boat sank.

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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Brain fart

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

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Horse.

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How do you confuse a black man? Call him from a blocked number and I say "I love you"

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

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Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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ok

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All of these jokes are about white people

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What was the racist kid's least favorite ice cream flavor? Chocolate for an unrelated reason.

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Why doesn't your dad want to have sex with your mom? Because my penis is already in her vagina, thus your dad's inability to place his penis in her vagina.

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Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

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A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Assuming the fact that these children are in fact deceased, it would be highly inprobable that they could perform any task. Or that they would need to see any light at all, since the point of that dark room is to keep them concealed.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Why did Kristi drop her chap-stick? Kristi was of the many children held in hostage of the Jewish heritage during the times of Hitler's wrath. At the Concentration camps they were not given the opportunity to maintain a healthy, average diet thus decreasing her body strength. No longer could Kristi hold her chap-stick - alas her frail little fingers slowly released the cylinder shaped tube and hopelessly watched it hit the ground. As it hit the ground, a cloud of dust swept over Kristi's body. At the same time Kristi was taking a big whiff of fresh air (just kidding, the air at concentration camps were not fresh - it reeked of acid) she accidentally inhaled the dirt which fled through her body and made her faint. She woke up and it was a dream, lol.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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