what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How many trees does it take to screw in a light bulb? Trees are incapable of screwing light bulbs

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

thumb_up thumb_down -12

nolan is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why couldn't the cat drink milk? It Didn't have a face.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the black guy, the Mexican guy, and the Chinese guy have for lunch? A sandwich

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

* two sisters are making yo mam jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why couldn't the kid get into see the pairate movie? It was rated PG-13 and he was only 11. Plus he had no money and his mother didnt want him watching movies like that.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

thumb_up thumb_down -14

roses are red violets are blue me n' friends guna rape you trolololoLOLOLOlololOLLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLO01010101010111 666

thumb_up thumb_down -14

how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you say when you accidently punch a wasps nest? Nothing.The correct choice is ton run as fast as you can to avoid getting stung by the entire nest of wasps.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How long did it take Jeff, a middle-aged man with a lifelong speech-destroying lisp, to overcome his impediment? Less than ten minutes, as carbon monoxide is a colorless, odorless toxic gas that eliminates oxygen at a rapidly-acting rate inside of small areas such as the car Jeff locked himself inside.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops