Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

what did the man say to then other man when he said a joke, "Ha"

HEY YOU! TISSUE!

Paul walks on a bridge. It collapses.

Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Have u seen stevie wonders new house? No. Niether has he

The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it slipped from his hand.

Your dad walked into a bar. It was a gay bar.

SteVen Hawking wals into a bar

An elephant and a hippopotamus were taking a bath. The elephant said to the hippo, " Please pass the soap." The hippo replied, "No soap, radio."

Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

Why did the vagina smell so bad? Because it had yeast infection.

Your sex life.

I love you more than other things that are significantly less important to me than you are

life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

What happened to the baby in the microwave. I don't know I was too busy masturbating off to it in my clown suit

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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