What did the priest say to the young boy? Hi.

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there's a bus full of black people what do you call the white bus driver? coach.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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A. Knock Knock B. There is noone home so the individual goes home

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what do u get when two cars collide... a bunch of mexican

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-The proceeding statement is true. -The preceeding statement is false.

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"hey do you know the date" "58"

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Q: Why did the man have sex with Amanda Seyfried? A: Are you kidding me?

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A man walked into a bar, therefore beginning a lifetime of alcoholism that would slowly tear his family apart.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

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One kisses says: I have had 3 bottles of water today and I haven't peed yet. His friend says: O you probably have a urinary track infection.

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why did u put your iphone in the blender?!?!? because i wanted to make apple juice..

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

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How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

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whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven. Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" "No," the man replies, "I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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The kid wakes up in the middle of the night to get some water. But over hears sounds from his parents room. he looks through the keyhole. Then he comtinues walking and says. "Why does mom say i cant suck things?"

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A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

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What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown, sued the water company, bought a huge settlement and ran off with that slut Little Bo Peep.

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Q: What's the difference between Osama's death and Paris Hilton's bra? A: One is Osama's death and the other is Paris Hilton's bra.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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