Q: What would you think if a homeless person asked, "Spare change for drugs and cigarettes?" A: At least he was being honest.

Bare with me here, im gonna change this up a bit What's better then finding a worm in your apple

There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

what is red and bad for your teeth? a brick

How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

Why did the kid drop his ice-cream? Because he tripped on a dead guy!

Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

What did the tiger say to the jellyfish? Nothing; tigers can't talk. And if they could the chances of a tiger meeting a jellyfish would be very slim.

teacher: say ur alphabet kid: abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwuxyz kid:wheres the pee teacher:half way down my leg

Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

A man walks into a barbershop. He gets a crew cut and leaves.

A white man is found dead in an alley way, who was the murderer? The black guy trying to climb up the walls to escape.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

How did the guy survive the plane crash? He didnt, He died like everybody else.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Sigh... I gotta go to night class studies okay?

Why did Little Suzy get hit by a truck? Well the real question is, "Why was Little Suzy in the road," so why was she? Because she felt like it.

A man walks into a bar.. and has a bomb strapped to his chest

knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get the bag.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...