Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

WHO LET THE GHOST OUT! BOO BOO BOO BOO BOO! Mortals: That was a bit funny...

What did the meteorologist say when there was tornado? There is a tornado 7 miles West of the station.

God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a bus.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender says what will it be? The duck replies "lemonade!"

What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

Hey I just met you, And this is crazy But I just kissed you... And I have rabies!

a black man walked into a black bar. what color was the bar afterwards? the same color. its a drinking spot not a pole

I'm Polish.

What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

Penis chickens

Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

what is juicy and smells like juice,but it is not juice? juice. i lied about it not being juice.

what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

What's worst than finding a worm in your apple? A fat kid sitting on you

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

What do you call a black garbage man? A garbage man

Why did Elmo get depressed? All his friends sacrifised themselves to satan

roes are red violets are blue we have nothing in common so baby were through

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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