Why did the young boy cross the road? because his dad beats him due to alcoholism and his mother is a crack whore.

What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

Who invented apple? God

What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

What's worse than the holocaust? The Jews.

why is 6 afraid of 7 because seven is black

what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

The diamond one below is hilarious.

Why did the man get a penis Becuse he was gay Add on He died

Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

what's the square root of pi? nothing. why would you add roots to pie, how gross.

Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

Why did a man throw butter out the window ? So he could see butter fly and then realized that there was one on window cil

How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

What did the tree say to the kite? She got hit by a fridge.

Hi I'm Ben What's your name? I forgot. Hi "I forgot" what's your name? Ben

What did the dubstep say? Wub.

What has nine arms and sucks? Four children with two arms snacking on a lollipop, and one child with one arm snacking on a lollipop.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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