What did the black man say to the mexican? Hello

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

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What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

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Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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Knock knock Who's there? Fuk Fuk who?

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Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

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What do you call cheese that you don't own? Cheese.

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

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knock, knock who's there you yoohoo i don't like chocolate milk!

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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the lemon was sweet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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