A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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A white man applies for a job two weeks later he finds out he lost the job to a hardworking Mexican who went to college and payed his debts

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What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

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What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

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what's worse than 24? 6 million.

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Why did the Japanese man fall down the stairs? He was blind and deaf and not aware of his surroundings to prevent himself from doing so.

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Yo mama is so hairy she should probably start shaving.

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Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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A monk went to a bar. He soon came out because he realized he didn't have cash because he left his wallet in his other robe.

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A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

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Yo mamma so fat when I searched her on the internet, I got 28,000,000 results

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99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

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What did the dog say to the astro turf? SHUT UP!! I don't want to here your excuses, put the dishes away when you're done with them or so help me! You see the dog had been abused as a puppy and as a result he was always a bit off.

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

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What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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Trump will make America great again.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

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An albino and a jew walk in to a bar. They both order the same drink and chat for a few minutes before the albino must get home to his wife. The jew leaves shortly after, tipping the bar tender a generous amount for his superb service.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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