Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.

Hey! Have you ever heard of the Alzheimers joke?

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite. He died the following day.

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

Sam Hengal.

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

can't you hear that TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT, TOOT Ta TOOT TOOT flute (nicki minaj in a past life listening to a symphony)

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

What do you call a truck full of dead babies? Not enough.

I was just thinking of how much i laughed at the challenger launch.

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar, they manage to have a delightful evening, despite their religious differences.

-Knock Knock? -Who's There? -David Baxter. -David Baxter Who? -Wha- What? What do you mean "David Baxter who?" We were best friends in high school. YOU WERE THE BEST MAN AT MY WEDDING!! *David Baxter proceeds to cry, as he doesn't know of his dear friend's Alzheimer's disease*

A duck walks into a 7-11 and says "Give me some Chap-stick, and put it on my bill!" But the cash register attendee doesn't speak English and cannot understand him. He does, however, question whether his God is punishing him because, as all people know, ducks cannot speak. However, this hallucination must be punishment for a horrid misdeed. The employee breaks down into tears and begins reciting a prayer. The duck, slightly miffed, walks out, pondering why he'd need Chap-stick anyway, since he has no lips.

You know you're dyslexic when life gives you melons.

What did the boy say when be landed in the bottom of the well, nothing he was dead.

How did the mouse die It was eaten by a cat How did the cat die It jumped into the bathtub and drowned

Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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