Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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What did the underprivileged girl get for Christmas? Nothing because Santa Claus is a media generated holiday icon and the real St. Nicolas has been deceased for almost 700 years.

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Two parrots were sitting next to each other. One parrot said "hey" The other parrot replied "hey" therefore making the first parrot say "hey" which made the other parrot say "hey" again making the... this conversation, comprised of just one word lasted a very long time. aproximately 16749 hours.

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What is life? Paul.

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why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

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2 pilots rowed a boat across the desert. How long did it take to reach the moon? Answer: Purple because chickens don't use magic.

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Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Bitch

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Why did the little girl fall to death? Because pigs can't fly. It's impossible.

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Why did Muhammad pray to Jesus? Because he has low self esteem and didn't believe in himself.

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

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XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

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Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

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whats funnier than womens rights? ottos weight

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car and die.

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roses are grey violets are grey so says my color blind cousin

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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What did the apple tree say to the farmer? "Stop picking on me"

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Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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