What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

How do you get a priest out of a tree? Throw a canoe at him.

What's the difference between a park bench and a hobo? The park bench can support a family

why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

What is worse then dying of testicular cancer? Living of testicular cancer and having one amputated?

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Max

What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

What's worse than the WNBA? The Cleveland Cavaliers.

What is brown and sticky? A Stick

how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

Shush girl, shut your lips do the Helen Keller and advocate the rights the disabled.

Why can't the T-Rex give high fives? Because they are extinct.

A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

What's worse than blowing out 1 lightbulb Blowing out 2 lightbulbs

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? Don't be ridiculous. First of all, scientifically this is near impossible and secondly, what use would a kangaroo with wool be? Sheepdogs would become obsolete and they would be a nightmare to shear. Imbecile.

So coool! How did you do that dinosaur!?

Why did the baby fall off the swing? It had no arms or legs. Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in the face.

what did the dead guy say to the boy? nothing he is dead.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

How do you get a clown off a swing? You kill him with an axe

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because most living organisms eventually cross some form path that is commonly known as a road. Roads are hard asphalt that is very good for cars and other wheeled road licensed vehicles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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