Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

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Yes!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!! Yes!!!

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Tim: You wanna hear an anti-joke? Billy: Yes! Tim: Okay, I've got one for you Billy: Let's hear it! Tim: 1

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A Dyslexic man went to a posh, bought a badnana, and put it no his neck, and lawked around twon.

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What's blue and rhymes purple? Get Out

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Why was the baby's face red? Because it was bloody.

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how many jews fit in an oven? none, its illegal to put a person in an oven....

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WHAT HAS MAN BOOBS THE SIXE OF JUPITER BOMBER NEVILLE

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What Batman said to Robin before they got in the car? -Get in the car Robin!

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Pokemon are fictional, therefore Pikachu is fictional, meaning he would never be at a bus station in the real world at all.

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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roses are red, windows are clear, get off your ass and bring me a beer

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What has eyes but can't see? A blind person.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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what's the difference between eric bristow and colin baker? eric bristow is brilliant at darts.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

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How many women does it take to changed a light bulb? 12. 11 to form a committee and 1 to make her boyfriend do it.

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Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

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How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

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why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7-8-9

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What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing, walls are inanimate things therefore it cannot talk.

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Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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