Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

Why didn't the boy finish the race? He was handicapped

how do you boil oil? add b to oil

What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

What's big, white, and red all over? A refrigerator that happened to fall on a small child.

Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

A man died. What was his name? Phil. His name was Phil.

A horse shits himself SHITLESS!

Dyslexia ruels!

roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

What do you call a black man approaching your car in uniform whose name happens to be Darius? Officer Darius.

What is brown and sticky? A stick

4 men walk into a bar. They have fun. ~Yasmin~

q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

Patient- "Doctor, doctor help me! I've only got 59 seconds to live!" Doctor- "I'll be there in a minute."

Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

Why is my phone bill so low this month? Because you have no friends.

Knock knock! Who's there? ... There was no reply because the person who knocked was the mailman delivering a package, and he had a tight schedule so he couldn't stay around to chat.

Who loves George Clooney? George Clooney

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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