Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? hypothermia.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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What do you call a blue horse with two legs and five eyes? A blue horse with two legs and five eyes.

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what is red and lies on the floor? the boy that jumped out of the plane

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Rhetorical question.

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I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

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Whats brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

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What did the woman get for Christmas? Cooking oil and a black eye.

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My mother's star sign was Cancer. Ironic how she died really. She was attacked by a giant crab.

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why did jimmy's mom fall off the cliff? i dont know.

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what do you get when you have an albino black man, a lesbian middle eastern siamese twin of the female gender, a polygamist indian and a jewish native american? A very cultured and diversified posse of hostages. Take your pick.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

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What is the similarity between fake rings and your mother? They change colors in the shower

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You help him down.

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what did the left eye say to the right eye? "eye" see you

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What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? I don't know. It depends how high the light is.

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PLEASE DONT READ THIS OR YOU'LL BE DIED IF YOU DONT THUMBS UP THIS LIKE POST THIS ON 20 MESSAGES OR YOU'RE BEST MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR LIFE WITHIN THE NEXT 7 DAYS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops