An over weight person is diagnosed with anorexia they used to be fatter

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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why did the black man get kicked out of the hospital? nothing was wrong with him.

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Yo mamma so fat that when she gets in bed she gets sleepy

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:D STORY TIME! :D ... :D So once upon a time there was a... :) Uhm... :\ I forgot... Sorry :(

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What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, water and sand are incapable of speech. Unless of course you are Harry Potter in which case you can cast a spell on them and turn them into a cat which still couldn't talk and them from there you could wait for them to evolve which doesn't actually exist so you would have to ask God and then you would wait for a few years than they could say hi.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

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Why does Amy leave Dan? Dan gets hit by a bus.

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3 guys are in a car crap manners and shut up.shut up is driving and crape falls out the window so manners goes and gets him. A cop pulls over shut up.he goes what's your name son?shut up.where's your manners boy?over there picking up crape.

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A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews undergo metabolism, maintain homeostasis, possess a capacity to grow, respond to stimuli, reproduce and, through natural selection, adapt to their environment in successive generations. More complex living organisms can communicate through various means.[1][5] A diverse array of living organisms (life forms) can be found in the biosphere on Earth, and the properties common to these organisms—plants, animals, fungi, protists, archaea, and bacteria—are a carbon- and water-based cellular form with complex organization and heritable genetic information. Pizza does not.

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What do a blueberry and a raspberry have in common? They are both commonly used in parfaits.

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A Homosexual, a platypus, and a rubber spoon walk into a bar...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? She had no purpose.

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Roses are black Violets are Black I'm Hellen Keller

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What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

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What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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what do u tell a woman who has two black eyes? nothing, somebody already told her twice.

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My brother is crazy... crazy like a fox! I caught him eating a Possum on the side of the road yesterday.

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It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

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Why did Sally fall of the swing set? Because she got hit with a mattress

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why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops