Wanna hear a joke? What? Life.

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how did the little black boy cross the river? he walked over the bridge.

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Q: What did little Jimmy get his grandfather for Christmas? A: Nothing his grandfather died on Thanksgiving

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat up the room for being black

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So a baby seal walks into a club

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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A man used a ruler to measure his foot, it was size 11

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How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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Why did the boy live on the street? He was an orphan.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him to the vet and have him put to sleep, it's the only humane thing to do.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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What rhymes with turtle? RAPE

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Once, a woman told her son to be a peach and fetch some sugar. Little did she know that a genie heard her. The next day, she was horrified to find her son gone and a peach in his bed.

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What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

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MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

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your momas so stupid she s going back to school to become a responsible adult

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? alot of things, worms don't taste that bad.

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Your father must be an alien because he's driving a UFO

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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What is the best thing in the world? The opposite of the worst thing in the world.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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