What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? The lawyer is a human being whose profession is to give legal advice and assistance to clients and represent them in court or in other legal matters while the catfish is a freshwater or marine fish with whiskerlike barbels around the mouth, typically bottom-dwelling. -BG_Shank_A

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Do Your Homework: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Get An Award At School: Mum - Well Done Dad - Well Done Figure How To Adjust The Zoom On Your Computer: Mum & Dad - WOW HOW DO YOU KNOW SO MUCH, YOU'RE SO CLEVER, WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS?! Typical ...

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did you know towels can cause dry skin?

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HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What looks like a black book but is actually white? I don't know because it can't look like a black book if it's white.

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Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

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A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

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A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

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What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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yo mama is so hairy she has afros on her nipples

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what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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NA LINDOL BA KAPAG NATALON ANG MATATABA :8

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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