A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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i had sex.

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Why do people insist on drinking diet soda meanwhile eating extremely unhealthy food? Because some people like the taste of diet soda over regular soda.

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What did Santa say when he fell down? Ouch

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A termite walks intio a bar, looks the lovely timber bar up and down, and wonders out loud..."where's the bar tender?"

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Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

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whats the difference between slade , and wizard? wham

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how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man? Nothing becasue a mute is a person who cannot speak and a deaf man ould not hear the jumbled mumblings anyway.

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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A lesbian couple, a straight couple, and a gay couple walk into a bar. They enjoy their drinks and camaraderie.

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Why did the chicken taunt the opposing team? To get to the other side.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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what is the difference between a picture of brooklyn decker and my grandma....i jack off to the picture of my grandma

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There were two busses. The one was red, the other one went to France.

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Who would be an amazing GOP VP? Chris Christie -Mitt Romney

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by your great grandma

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Paul walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: no

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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Guess what else smells like tuna!?! A dead tuna fish in a can

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops