Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

Songs can be interpreted in many different ways you know: "Whenever, Wherever" - Prostitution "You raise me up" could be an advert for Viagra; And as for "love is in the air" - masturbating from a rooftop comes to mind. [L]

A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

whats worse than being raped by a giant scorpion getting raped by 2 giant scorpions

About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

What's red and can sing? Elmo

A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

Roses are red Violets are blue I can't rhyme The end

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

What is more annoying then finding a worm in your apple you

Q: Where does the queen of england live? A: This was the question I had to anwser to be able to post this joke.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

Why didnt santa leave presents under the tree? Because santa doesnt exist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it was hit by a car

Why did the young girl fall off her bike? Because somebody threw a fridge at her.

Why did the chicken not make it across the road? Because he got hit by a transport.

whats the difference between a fat person and a skinny person ? there weight.

What did the asian say to the President of the United States? I don't speak English

What is Hitler's favourite Yu-Gi-Oh card? Blue Eyes, White Dragon.

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

Chuck Norris threw a grendade, killed 50 people, then it exploded This is a highly improbable event considering no man is faster then a grenade

What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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