What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

Face Hunter is scum

What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

so a salesman knocks on a mans' door and asks if he would like to hear a salespitch but the man didn't answer he came back two minutes later and knocked and asked if the man would be intrested in some girl scout cookies and the man tore the door off the hinges.

Why did the man kill the hamster? To get to the other side.

Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

What happened when Stephen Hawking tried to go down the stairs? He fell and suffered minor injuries.

Knock knock. Who's there? Stop fucking around I told you I was coming. I'm sorry. Come in.

knock knock whose there? banana? banana who? im sorry but you have to go to the doctor now.......

JOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN WHAT'S THE ANSWER?! WHAT DO YAH MEAN YA DUNNO?!

Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

There is a black guy a white guy and a Mexican, whose driving. The other black guy.

What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

What is the difference between Sarah Jessica Parker and a horse? Sarah Jessica Parker is a human being who is also a very skilled actress A horse is a animal which is usualy kept in a barn

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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