Hi, this is Luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

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Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Once i tried to do math ! She wasn't getting wet so i stopped!

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What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

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Give one reason for not visiting a hotel. Basil Fawlty is the manager.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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How do you get 100 Jews into a car? You can't. It's physically impossible.

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Yo mamma so poor she got a job.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

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knock knock whos there? your dr you have cancer

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Why was the dog sweating? It was locked in a car on a hot day.

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

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k

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What do you call a Black person in a city with high crime rates? Whatever their name happens to be.

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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