Q: What do you call a dog with metal balls and two-inch legs? A: Animatronic

What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

Where did sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.

What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

yo mamma's so fat she's fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

Why was the elf sad Because a polar bear ate his family

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

Your mother smells so bad that if she were alive in 1919 she would most likely be outlawed in the Geneva Convention or at least banished from conventional warfare among nations that adhere to the restrictions imposed by such a document

what do u say when u steal something? STOLEN!!!!!!!!!

Why didnt the guy knok on the door Because the door was open to begin with

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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