A hobo said to another hobo "Im homeless"

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What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting Cancer.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why did the black woman have an affair? Because she had an unsatisfying sex life, her old husband was boring, and she was curious about being with other men.

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Knock knock Whos there? Knock knock Who's there? Knock knock Who's there?! "is anyone home this is Helan Keller"

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Hey, did you see that episode of Glee last night? It was awesome! Especially that scene where they all sang. It wasn't as good as the previous ones, but I think the show it making a comeback.

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96

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Why was the boy cold? Because he couldn't afford clothing.

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-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

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How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

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What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

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A: Why is that boy on the ground? B: He fell. A: Why did he fall? B: He tripped. A: Why did he trip? B: I tripped him. A: Why did you... B: BECAUSE I WANTED TO!

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What do a spoon and a platypus have in common? Nothing.

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Who was at the door when Helen Keller answered? She doesn't know

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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Thank you very much for being so kind to me throughout the years. I have never known a better man. Rest in peace.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

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Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

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A man walks into the bar and ask the bartender for a shot of vodka. He drinks the vodka.

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What do you do if a bird shuts on your windscreen? A:never take her out again.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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I remember the last words my Grandfather said before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

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How do you confuse a blonde? Inform her that she is an illegitimate child resulting from a vicious, torturous rape and that her mother will never truly love her.

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My son made a tree fort, it burned down.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops