Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

Knock knock? Who's there? Herpes. Bummer.

What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

what do you do when see a young girl crying on the swingset? ask her kindly to move, as you would like a turn

Roses are red, violets are blue; So give me head, or I queue you!

Why doesn't a duck's quack echo? Evolution.

One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

why did the woman commit suicide? because 2+2=4

what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

Q: When you have alot of hair, what are you? A: Obease

How many are in a baker's dozen? 12 bakers

Why was the drunk man in jail? He had lost touch with himself because his wife cheated on him the previous night and to add to the fact she took his clothes so public nudity would be a problem.

yo Mama so stupid a robber stole her t.v and she ran after him yelling, YOU FORGOT THE REMOTE!

what do asians do in asian history month, nothing, it does not exist, hahaha

Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

What do you call a person with no arms, legs, and teeth singing in the middle of the street while spinning? I don't know.

Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

Q: What do you call half of the worlds population of black people on the moon. A: Close enough.

How do you spot a paedophile in a playground? You don't, there are usually a lot of adults around.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple

what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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